Don't get me wrong, I welcome every voice that shouts for an independent investigation. It doesn't matter to me which "side of the aisle" it comes from, or whether or not the person shouting has a title. I don't care if some people want to dismiss activism as political campaigning. If that voice convinces even one more person to get involved, I'm all for it.
What bothers me is the idea that politics may be keeping Ethan's family from getting the answers they deserve.
This isn't about good ol' boys backing each other up. This is about a family who has lost someone they love for NO GOOD REASON.
Every now and then I have to back off of the internet and give myself some time to recover. Then I'll see something, or read something that makes me so upset I get physically ill.
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During our first "Tweet-a-thon" (Thursday night sessions when a group of dedicated people tried to get #JusticeForEthan to trend on Twitter) I saw this message from Ethan's sister, Emma.
I'm not sure how anyone could read that and not feel something.
This week, it happened again.
Several news reports came out of Frederick this week that infuriated me even more (which I really didn't believe was possible). In the last seven months we've all read horrible comments from internet trolls, watched and pleaded while government officials remained silent, and eventually read the report hoping for answers and only ended up with more questions. The worst part is that some people actually applaud the deputies' actions and blame the victim. I can't help but feel angry and discouraged.
And then it hits me. If I feel this way, imagine how Ethan's family feels.
So if anyone is wondering why I can't let this go, why I research and watch for any news or link to events taking place in my hometown...
this is why.
While doing my regular scan of the FCSO's Facebook page, one comment knocked me over.
A notice for an event that made me furious, made Patti think how Ethan would have loved to go.
While I'm struggling to find justice, create some picture in my head of what that might look like, and wonder if I'll ever feel safe letting Josh out of my sight, Patti has to think about what she and Ethan are missing.
As I walked up our driveway hours before he died, I never thought that it would be the last time I would hear “Emmy’s back!” shouted with so much enthusiasm it came through the closed windows. Never again will I be hugged so tightly that my feet are lifted off the floor. And on my wedding day, I will only dream of what it would have been like to see the joy on my brother’s face as he and my father walked me down the aisle, the way Ethan had talked about since we were children. My life is forever changed because of one night, one decision and one monumental lack of understanding.
If these quotes aren't enough to break your heart, and get you involved, just look at the pictures published by the Washington Post here in a photo album entitled "Remembering Ethan Saylor." Two of them made me weep, the emotion of Ethan's brother, Adam, and the notebook with Ethan's handwriting that says "Deputy Sheriff Chuck Jenkins."
This is a deeply personal story (for Ethan's family, for me, and for all the parents who have connected to it because they worry about their own children) - it's not about political posturing. At least it shouldn't be.
So yes, I've said it before, and now, four months later, I'll say it again. I'm still posting, Tweeting, sharing, emailing, and whatever else I can do. I'm just hoping my efforts add one more voice to chorus.